Ashes and Tears

Two weeks ago, Colorado Springs experienced the worst wild fire of their history. The flames came right into the city. The smoke and ash went everywhere. The tears of those affected seemed endless and yet, out of those tears came a resolve to rebuild, to go on. Last week, we took Dean’s ashes home and spread them in a beautiful spot from his childhood that he had picked for himself. Yes, there were tears. It is hard for me to explain the emotions and the feelings. I felt he was finally happy, finally where he wanted to be. I saw the release and relief in his children’s faces. I saw his best friend’s face and it was there too. I saw understanding of his desire to be in this place rather than where they had known him. I saw love and respect, and most important of all, I saw life move forward and begin again.

I know there are great difficulties ahead for the people who lost their homes in the Waldo Canyon fire. They must deal with insurance claims and proving exactly what they owned and lost in the fire. They will think of things months from now and it will bring fresh pain. Grieving is a long process. It isn’t here one day and gone the next. All the time you are moving forward and resuming  your life, you are knitting the fabric of a new garment out of the old. Some of the stitches that must be torn out will be painful. Some you won’t find until an unexpected occasion reminds you of what you lost. It is a process and one that only happens with time. Give yourself time. Don’t hide from the tears. They are like rain, they wash away the unendurable emotions and give you a fresh start.

It is raining in Colorado Springs.

About Barbara K Tyner

A graduate of UCCS with a degree in English Lit., Barbara writes Children's Literature as well as mainstream fiction. Her popular children's series, The Badger Books, is co-authored with Barbara's daughter, Laura. Her first novel, "Wait Here, Wait There" deals with grief and Alzheimer's. Her second novel, Rhyaden, a middle grade fantasy released Nov. 2018. Gardening, exploring National Parks, Kayaking, hiking, and snow-shoeing top her list of favorite hobbies.
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2 Responses to Ashes and Tears

  1. Patty Smith says:

    I want to comment but I don’t think I have the words. That was so well written and communicated on so many levels. Ashes and tears indeed. Patty

    • Thanks Patty. Right now balancing the distinctly different processes the kids are grieving with is my challenge. That and their thoughts on the farm. I tell myself I don’t have to get in the middle and I am trying hard not to, but – that is difficult too.

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